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Dating & Domestic Violence

Dating or domestic violence happens to people of all genders, sexual orientations, ages, races and ethnicities, cultural and religious backgrounds, economic situations, geographical settings, and other social identities. The details and mechanisms might be different, but the essence is still the same: abusers seek to control their intimate partners through fear and intimidation.

Dating Violence

Any act of violence committed by a person who is or has been in a social relationship of a romantic or intimate nature with the victim and where the existence of such a relationship is determined based on a consideration of the length, type, and frequency of interactions between the persons involved in the relationship.

Domestic Violence

A felony or misdemeanor crime of violence committed by:

  • a current or former spouse or intimate partner of the victim;
  • a person with whom the victim shares a child in common;
  • a person who is cohabitating with or has cohabitated with the victim as a spouse or intimate partner;
  • a person similarly situated to a spouse of the victim under the domestic or family violence laws of the jurisdiction; or
  • any other person against an adult or youth victim who is protected from that person's acts under the domestic or family violence laws of the jurisdiction.

Forms of Violence

Violence, in the context of dating violence and domestic violence, means the use of, or threatened use of,  physical force with intent, effect, or reasonable likelihood of causing pain, harm, injury, or damage to any person or property. Dating or domestic violence can take many forms and every situation is different.

Here are some forms dating and domestic violence may take:

Physical Violence

Physical violence may involve:

  • hitting
  • kicking
  • pushing
  • restraining 
  • shoving
  • choking 
  • destroying/threatening property or pets 
  • threatening physical harm 

The physical violence can be direct, using hands or feet, or be committed with weapons or household objects.

Sexual Violence

Sexual assault is any sexual act directed against another person, without the consent of the victim, including instances where the victim is incapable of giving consent. 

Sexual violence within a relationship can occur in single incidents or in patterns where the violated partner's wishes are disregarded.

Stalking

Stalking an intimate partner is also prohibited, including stalking via electronic means. This involves texts, social media, phones, and other media.

Some examples include:

  • hacking into or demanding passwords for social media and email accounts
  • sending negative or unwanted messages including those of a sexual nature
  • looking through a partner's phone or making demands about what sorts of activity they are "allowed" to engage in

 Dating or Domestic Violence can happen in:

  • marriages
  • long term committed partnerships
  • cohabitation
  • casual dating relationships
  • social relationships where there is sexual or intimate contact
  • relationships that have ended

The way you describe your relationship doesn’t matter-- you deserve to be safe and happy in your relationship. 

If you’re experiencing signs of dating or domestic violence, please talk to someone to learn how you can get help.